I know that some of you heard me say this on Saturday, but I wanted to put it on the internet so that the whole world will know.
This is my ultimate fantasy. I have thought about this every night for a year now, and I hope that one day my fantasy will become a reality.
I am sitting on the couch one afternoon, all by myself watching Sportscenter when my door swings open. Sabina Gupta walks in to my apartment and smiles, not saying a word. I look up at her and I notice that there is something different about her… not her hair, not what she’s wearing… just something… different. I can’t quite figure it out until I look her in the eyes. Her eyes are both unusually pink and are surrounded with a yellowish crust. Oh my God, Sabina has pink eye!
Now I started to get excited because I know that Sabina will be giving me pink eye again, unless she is hear to tease me by giving me “blue eyes!” I’ve had Sabina give me pink eve before, and ever since my recovery, I’ve wished for some kind of Sabina induced relapse!
She grabs the remote and turns off the TV and then winks at me with her left eye. As she does this, the smallest bit of eye crust falls off and drops slowly to the ground. Sabina then licks two fingers on her right hand. She takes these fingers and begins running them gently and circularly around her right eye, making sure to transfer the conjunctivitis to her fingers. Then she does some kind of erotic finger dance that is hard to describe using words, moving her fingers back and forth seductively in front of my face, getting closer and closer. Oh my. I am so excited now… it’s really happening!
As she touches her infected hand to my right eye, I let out a slight moan of joy. She starts rubbing my eye, not too rough, but not too gentle.
“Yeah Sabina, that’s how I like it.”
“How do you like it Fred?”
“Make my eye crusty and nasty baby!”
She continues working my right eye until there is no way that I am not infected, and then when she is finished, she does the same thing to my left eye. After she is finished, I fall asleep, content and spent.
The next morning, Sabina gently nudges me to wake me up. As I try to open my eyes, I realize that I can’t because they are crusted shut! I have pink eye! My fantasy has come true, I can now die happy. But wait, Sabina wipes the crust off of my eyes, and holds one of them open. I look up at her, smiling as she squeezes an eye drop into my eye.
“Oh yeah, baby, no one can make my eyes burn like you,” I say.
I think to myself: its gonna be a great week!