Saturday, March 19, 2005

Miami--Part I

Yo whazzup Civitans! Its halftime now for the Kentucky Cincinati game and so i'm gonna write the first of what will probably be many post-Miami articles.

Frist off i gotta give a lil apology to McGangsta. Even though you did get beat like a redheaded step child by carse in the drinking contest you still were pretty wasted. also sorry for all the seemingly anti-mcgarity comments on my last post but carse and tyler were sitting on both sides telling me to add certain things... anyways...

As soon as i finished writing my last article, carse tried to read it aloud. tyler and frank were witnesses to this and it was hella funny. it took about 20 minutes and a lot of it was repeated over and over. also he struggles with words , basically sealing his MOST WASTED status.

that night i was sleeping when i heard a noise. i looked at the clock and saw 3:33. i looked to my right and i saw Mcgarity holding his penis. he was standing over tyler who was sleeping on the couch. I yelled out "john what are you doing?" he said "peeing" i said "you cant do that... stop!" and i started yelling at him. he put his junk back in his pants and then quickly pulled it back out. he moved about a step to the right and stopped. i started yelling again about how he cant just pee on tyler. john replied with the funniest thing i had heard all day "i'm just gonna go on the couch, not on tyler so its cool." i yelled at him to go to the bathroom, but instead he walked outside. well... about 10 minutes later i was still awake and john hadnt come back yet so i went outside. i wasnt too surprised to find john sleeping flat on his back in the grass outside! after a few minutes of trying to convince him to come back in i finally said fuck it and went to bed. about an hour later john came in and started bitching about how freezing it is outside. i asked him if he remembered almost peeing on tyler and he said "shit yeah i do!"........

The next day was Miami and the sweetest thing was probably going to tha bitchin club. Someone came up to the room and and some wrist bands that were suposed to get us into a hot club for free. So we all went down and walked for like 45 miles following behing this shady dude who just kept meeting up with more shady people and saying that we were almost there. When we go tthere of course the club wasnt free and the wanted $20 for the dudes.... McFuck that! So we went to another club where thay said it was $5 to get in and we would get a free drink voucher. I paid the money but half the peope didn't (FUCK YOU T). I went in the club to find a small ass club with like 3 people in there. Phil told me and T that the free drink was just orange juice, so T decided to take matters into his own hands and piss all over their bathroom floor. Well... I was the fourth person in the bathroom and it was fucking disgusting, but i noticed that one wall was bare so i finished off the job.

By far the sweetest thing that happened there was when this Ecxtasy'd out retarded looking bitch started dancing with T. Oh man, it was so funny! This was one of the scariest bitches i'd ever seen and they were dancing pretty close when T started petting her hair. The funniest though was when she started trying to play with his McPenis. This scared T off, but when he left her along, she came over and stuck her hand up my shirt and tweaked my nipple. I just turned around and ran off laughing. When we left we saw her walking with a couple of black dudes... can you say "gangbang?"

Another thing that ruled about the club was that we all go to dance with this huge black chick and by huge i mean about 2.5-3 bills big. We all danced with her and her gigantic ass almost knocked us over. She loved T the best though and there is a sweet pic of him with her. Other cool things that night were DJ Alex and also the induction of the first female member to the Makeout Posse.

man... this kentucky cinci game is sweet... i gotta watch the rest now

i'll be back tomorrow or monday with part 2 of miami...

look forward to reading about:

The Douchenheimer Convention
Jocelyn's Bro's Adventures
My sweet-ass hat
Baja Fresh
and more!!!


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